Style in the broadest sense of all, is consciousness.

Most people are at present content to cherish their mere identity. This is not enough. Our identity is just a group of ill-assorted characteristics that we happen to be born with. Like our fingerprints, if they are noticed at all, they will almost certainly be used against us.

You have to polish up your raw identity into a life-style so that you can barter with the outside world for what you want. This polishing process makes your life so formal that by comparison the life of a Trappist monk is an orgy.

The search for a life-style involves a journey to the interior. This is not altogether a pleasant experience, because you not only have to take stock of what you consider your assets but also have to take a long look at what your friends call "the trouble with you". Nevertheless, the journey is worth making. Indeed, we might say that the whole purpose of existence is to reconcile the glowing opinion we have of ourselves with the terrible things other people say about us.

If, when you peer into your soul, you find that you are ordinary, then ordinary is what you must remain, but you must be so ordinary that you can imagine someone saying, "Come to my party and bring your humdrum friend," and everyone knowing that he meant you.

Further passages from this great, but sadly out of print, book will be reproduced here on a fortnightly basis.